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Saturday, November 23, 2024

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Post-Christmas Carolling Analysis...


Conservativity has made it a point to check on the Democrats and their Christmas carolling.  It often reflects their thoughts and hopes during this holiday season.  So, we borrowed some surveillance equipment from the NSA and captured several prominent Leftists singing on the 25th.  They all sang songs that, strangely, were to the tune of Nat King Cole’s A Christmas Song.  So, here are some prominent Libs’ takes on Christmas:


Howard Dean, DNC Chairman:
Karl Rove roasting on an open fire,
Dick Cheney beaten with a hose.
Don Rumsfeld being hung by a wire,
Scooter Libby hearing jaildoors close.

Everybody knows
that horrid Republican woe
Helps to make my season bright.
Moonbat libs with their eyes all aglow,
Will find it hard to sleep tonight.

They know the election’s on its way
Our friends got rid of Tom DeLay.
We’ll loudly lie that Bush loves to spy
And try to make the GOP die.

And so I’m offering this crazy thought
We’ll relive 1992
Then we won’t have to excuse all the
times that we lose,
"Merry Christmas to you."


Michael Moore:
Whole Cows roasting on an open fire,
Big Macs snorting up my nose.
The doctors tell me that my blood pressure is dire,
my big butt bursts forth from my clothes.

Everybody knows
Two turkeys and some mistletoe
are a nice snack when I’m eating light.
Whole tunas with their eyes all aglow,
Would sure be tasty tonight.

I hope that Santa’s on his way
with candy bars and cookies in his sleigh.
And you alll now that if I spy
A pound cake you can kiss it goodbye.

And so I’m offering this warning now 
To kids from 1 to 92
Although it’s been said many times,
Many ways,
"Stay Away or I’ll eat you."


Al Franken:
My network’s finances are truly dire,
More money, we are sure to lose.
Unfunny crap has us in a horrid mire,
So Aid money we will steal and use.

Everybody knows
I’m a turkey with a tale of woe
My bad jokes are a horrid blight.
Tiny tots with their food cash all gone,
Will find it hard to eat tonight.

Another bad bit where we blow Bush away
and coal will pelt us from Santa’s sleigh. 
Even more will tune away  
From Air HATE America Today.

The evil neocons have washed the brains  
of all from 1 to 92
Their sickening morals make them constantly say,
"Merry Christmas to you."


Happy Holidays from Conservativity.